Ok,we have another long weekend holiday as from tomorow which is friday til Tuesday and knowing myself am going to end up drunk for more than half of that time.I dont think i could call myself much of a drinker,infact i can go a whole week even two or three without touching any alcohol but when i do i somehow seem to always end up drunk.
There is a pal's birthday bash tomorrow and i know as much as am trying to convince myself that i will stay on fresh juice i know i will crave the sweet sour taste of a smirnoff black ice,crispy cold.The very thought of it makes me want to have one now.Am i a binger? i dont know...
We had this bet with this guy who wanted to date me,he is saved(born again) and does not like my lifestyle although he claims to really like me and care about me,which i can believe to a certain degree(am a very likable girl-hehehe!) Thing is,he is too embarrased of me to introduce me to his friends or family coz i just wouldnt be right,they would hate me and think am not right for their goody goody son,brother, friend.Now am not being nasty and he has never said this himself but i know.How can you explain my not ever having met even his best friend? or that when i met his sister and cousin(by chance because i one day invited myself to go to church,his church,with him)he did not bother to introduce us, i had to charm my way into the crowd,made conversation,learn names without having to ask and make do until it was time to get away safely and not unkindly.Or that he himself tells me he wouldnt purposefully let his parents meet me? Anyhow, so this guy has made me bet with him that i would go a whole two weeks without alcohol and made the bet,but somewhere between i began to wonder why he had bet with me.I had agreed because i wanted to change for him,and somehow knowing that made me wake up and ask why.Why change for someone else?would he change who he is(the negatives) for me? I knew what the answer was.He would not change for me.So why should i feel that i need to for him?And i went out and got mysel a very cold smirnoff black ice and it was like honey to my throat.
Back to the original issue, am going to try be very dicsiplined about my drinking this long weekend holiday.I will drink but i will try not get drunk.About our interested party,well thats a story or another day so watch this space!