YEAH, its my birthday again
ok,its my birthday again today.It doesnt seem possible that a whole year has passed since the last one.i was kinda looking foward to this one,am not sure why but now that the day is almost done i begin to question myself and i cant come up with a plausible reason why i would be looking foward to any of my birhdays and more so this one.
Thing is my birhdays are always either full of disappointment or full of pain and every so often both.Ok so am twenty five yeras old,gosh am getting pretty old.Am trying to count my blessings,you know,so that i can have something t atleast smile about today.Maybe i should make a small list,just to remind myself that my life is not such a mess and am not cursed to an eternity of pain and misery.Weird mood to be in on your birthday,yeah,its not just happening on my birthday,i usually feel like this but today its worse perhaps because i haboured this secret hope that this year,just this year,someone would show me they remembered.Too bad.Ok its time to count my blessings
1.I am alive(though i sometimes wonder for what purpose)
2. i am not terminally ill(i have a case of peptic ulcer thats giving me hell but thats small stuff right?)
3.I have a beautiful 2 year old daughter who loves me(yeah until she realizes what/ who i am)
4.am not homeless( i get to crush at some pal's houses for a few days when my mother has beaten and thrown me out)
5.i finished campus finally(thank God for sisters with hearts the size of texas)
Ok am stuck, thats all i have at this point ,perhaps i'l think of something more tomorrow,if tomorrow comes